Released: 2017
“I Don’t Wanna Do This Anymore” by XXXTENTACION speaks to the complexities of a conflicted relationship, with elements of desire, regret, and self-deprecation. The song underscores the challenges of a relationship where emotional attachment and sexual attraction coexist with pain and doubt, all set against the backdrop of an artist wrestling with their own internal conflicts.
Breaking it down starting with “I should’ve let you know, that you’re my only one/I know you’re feeling numb, I’ll fuck you ’til you cum.” XXXTENTACION reveals a raw emotional connection with an individual who is his ‘only one.’ Yet, their relationship is complicated – he acknowledges his partner’s numbness and aims to use sexual intimacy as a means of connection and diversion from the emotional pain.
The next lines “Said, “I don’t understand, how you don’t got a man”/You want me in your bed, ’cause I’ve been in your head” digs deeper into the intricacies of their relationship. Even though there’s a strong connection, they’re not officially together, leading to confusion. He’s been on her mind, driving her desire for him, yet the relationship remains undefined.
Moving to “You’ve been up all night, so you don’t wanna wait on me/I’m about to catch my flight, so you don’t gotta wait on me”, the artist explores the idea of emotional distance. Their connection isn’t grounded, making the wait unbearable. His imminent flight signifies a physical distance that mirrors the emotional gap between them.
Iterating “You don’t wanna, you don’t wanna”, signifies the lady’s reluctance to wait and repeat the same cycle – she doesn’t want to experience the emotional upheaval that accompanies his inconsistent presence.
The lines “I’ve been up a very long time, wonder why they hate on me/I don’t wanna love myself, I’m praying that they all love me” highlight XXXTENTACION’s struggle with self-love and acceptance. Exhausted and facing hate from others, he yearns for external validation to compensate for his internal self-loathing.
No, no, no” repeats like a mantra at the song’s end. It’s a cry of denial, a refusal to accept the current state of his life and relationships.
In conclusion, “I Don’t Wanna Do This Anymore” paints a picture of a troubled relationship and personal dissatisfaction. It’s a haunting portrayal of the turmoil and confusion that can exist within love in its most complex form.
