Released: 2020
The track “…And to Those I Love, Thanks for Sticking Around” dives into the raw emotions of feeling outcast and existential dread. It’s a heavy reflection on mental health struggles, isolation, and the contemplation of ending it all. The song is haunting but resonates deeply with those who have grappled with similar demons.
The opening lines, “Take me home, it’s the one place I can rest in peace / Turn off my phone, so many messages I wish I could just delete,” convey a desperate need for escape and tranquility. The artist feels overwhelmed and bombarded by the outside world, seeking solace in solitude.
The lyrics “Questioning my existence / Questioning my decisions” show that the artist is struggling with self-doubt and regret. The metaphor “Burning down all the bridges” implies that they are intentionally cutting ties with people and opportunities, retreating into isolation.
“One last pic and I’ll be gone / Make it count, put the flash on” captures a sense of finality and the desire to leave a lasting impression. The repeated phrase “I’ll be dead by dawn” illustrates the gravity and urgency of their suicidal thoughts.
In the next verse, “Scrolling through my texts / Shit I left unread / Never trying to deal with it / There’s bliss up in my ignorance,” the artist avoids facing their problems, preferring to stay oblivious. This avoidance is a common coping mechanism, hinting at a deeper internal conflict.
The artist’s struggle with addiction is highlighted in “Ten dope dealers / Ex want me to see her / Can’t trust her, don’t believe her / Reply turn into a needle.” The mention of an ex and drug dealers underscores the toxic influences pulling them back into harmful patterns.
Lines like “These old habits will kill me quick / Quicker than I can blink / Quicker than I can think” reflect the fast descent into destructive behavior. The cycle of self-sabotage is apparent with “What the fuck do I do when sabotage is all I know?”
The song closes with “Kill me slow, slow / Curtains close low / Fuck, I don’t see what’s the point of going on,” a bleak resignation to their fate. The repetition of “no” reinforces the feeling of hopelessness and despair.
This track paints a stark picture of someone battling inner turmoil, addiction, and suicidal ideation, making it a powerful, albeit painful, listen.
